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No One Likes A Whiner

Updated: Apr 27, 2022

Tackling corporate bitching is no small feat.

I have some effective methods I use to curtail this soul stealing behavior. These tools work at every level and are particularly important for leaders owners, and executives.

First, I’ll share some insights on whining at work.

Whining/complaining/venting is a behavior rooted in our negativity bias. It’s tough to break a habit engrained in our human psych. It takes attention and a commitment to choosing a better action.

Why shouldn’t we whine at work? The obvious answer is that it creates a toxic culture.

Whining also undermines your ability to be seen as a leader. I can usually tell when a person has reached a level of maturity required to lead a team when they have stopped complaining. Full Stop. No complaining.

How does one reach this level of awareness and maturity? By managing your mind. Here’s my toolkit:

  1. Create space between trigger and action. Just slow the F down. Let your brain catch up with your emotions. Never jump on a call or email when you have been triggered.

  2. In this space do The Work” (Byron Katie)

The Work is a process that involves writing down troubling thoughts and then asking four questions:

  • Is it true?

  • Can I absolutely know it is true?

  • How do I react when I think that thought?

  • Who would I be without the thought?

3. Now, with the emotions that are remaining you may engage others professionally.

But first, decide what you want to outcome of engagement to be.

Some examples are:

  • Problem solving

  • Consideration/approval of your proposed solution

  • Letting others know you are aware of a problem and providing support/empathy