Unspoken Contracts Between Managers and Employees

Every manager-employee relationship has "rules." The trouble starts when they’re invisible.

These are the unspoken contracts—the silent agreements we think we’ve made, but never actually said out loud.

Managers assume: “They’ll come to me if they’re stuck.”Employees assume: “They’ll notice if I’m overwhelmed.”Managers think: “They know what urgency looks like.”Employees think: “I’m working late, so they must know I care.”

But here’s the truth: if you didn’t say it, they probably don’t know it.

Unspoken contracts create confusion, disappointment, and a low-grade tension that eats away at trust. You end up working at cross-purposes—not because you’re misaligned (ugh, I said it)—but because you never agreed on how you’d work together in the first place.

The fix? Explicit agreements.

As a manager, say the quiet parts out loud:

• “If you hit a wall, I expect you to tell me—don’t spin.”

• “When I assign something, I want a check-in midweek. No surprises.”

• “If priorities feel out of whack, bring it up. That’s part of the job.”

And then invite your employee to do the same. What do they need from you? How do they work best? What helps them feel successful?

This isn’t coddling. It’s clarity.

If you're asking someone to commit, you owe them a contract they actually signed.

~E