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Who are you???

Defining (and living) Your Personal Presence


It’s an interesting feeling to long for a version of ourselves. For me it sometimes looks like wanting to be that ambitious 29 year old woman who I once was. Other times I am inspired by women I meet who seem to have that wise elder vibe. I live sandwiched between no longer being who I used to be but not quite yet who I want to be.


I think this is the human condition.


In LeadWell, we talk about growing into the version of you that lights you up. In the context of being a well-rounded, holistic leader we find the words that describe this version.


We talk about what it looks like in practice. Both in times of ease and when the contents of our lives are under pressure.   


We build a list of about 5 words and then I offer coachees a challenge question:

 Do these words reflect who you are at work and at home?


Can you sit at your family dinner table and embody these words? If not, then you are not finished.


People hate this part.


I get it.


It feels wrong to let “corporate Jennifer” lead her family. We are conditioned to drop the mask when we clock out.


This exercise invites us to challenge how we view effective leadership. Leadership is a life skill. This title should fit like a glove. This congruence allows us to be in full integrity at all times and lead as an authentic human.


This way of leading invites more humanity into the workplace and more intention into your personal life.


If you can, take a moment right now and think about where your “work self” and your “real self” are in conflict.


This probably doesn’t feel great. For my clients, this disconnect is where our work lies. This can be especially true for my CEO clients. New Leaders often have no idea how to show up (remote work makes this even more visible.)


This integrated leader ethos also makes it clear that the cultivation of our personal presence is a living exercise.


It is impossible to choose overly aspirational words to describe ourselves if we are asked to live into them daily, in every corner of our lives.


I recommend that we choose one descriptor that is aspirational. That word ( and remaining consistent in the other areas) guides your leadership development work for this season.


The goal is to intentionally behave like the word we are growing into. I use a simple post it note on my laptop and in my journal to remind me to practice.


If I want to be a wise woman in the company annual meeting, the note reminds me to think before I speak, to allow others to take up space, and to call on my deep experience when needed to gently guide the team.


When I am growing into a new evolution of presence, I also ask for feedback and I self-reflect using this as a lens to evaluate myself.


Every year I do presence work. Every client of mine does this exercise with me as well.


This is how leaders walk the walk and feel deeply connected to their work.


May you live and LeadWell,




How to work with me:


LeadWell – An 8 Week Development Program for New Leaders

Vistage- 1:1 Executive Coaching and Peer Advisory Groups


There is currently a waitlist for LeadWell. You may register a single leader or a team for a September 2024 start date.

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