For many years my entire life was overwhelming. I felt like I could not handle one more thing.
I was literally appalled at the amount of responsibilities I had on my plate.
Is this you?
Leading a business, caring for children, managing a home, etc. etc. All the things.
Today I found myself back in that familiar feeling of complete overwhelm.
I was driving to an appointment for my son, running late, hungry, frantically sending multiple emails and texts, feeling very overwhelmed and I still had 7 hours of work/parenting left to go.
Today is a 14 hour day if I’m lucky.
Overwhelm is beating down the door.
Right now I’m sitting in the Dr’s office while my son has an MRI. My youngest son is playing video games on my phone and I’m typing this out. My heart is racing. I can feel the adrenalin and cortisol pulsing through my body.
And now I pause.
I need to do some thought work.
The Model (from the Life Coach School) is a great tool to get my life in perspective today.
The basis of The Model is that my feelings are caused by my thoughts about a situation, not the actual situation (circumstance).
So let’s go!
Circumstance: I have many things to do today
Thought: It’s too much to do alone
Feeling: resentful/overwhelmed
Action: I rush and am uptight
Result: nothing feels good or joyful
My result feels terrible. I literally feel terrible. I want to cry today.
In the model, the only thing you can change in the moment is your thought.
My thought is that this is too much to do alone.
How can I change this?
Here’s some options I entertain.
Thought option 1: I don’t need to do it all. That doesn’t feel quite right. These are things that my kids need and my business needs.
Thought option 2: I don’t have to do it alone. This does not work in the moment either. My husband is busy too. I don’t have family to assist. If I’m gonna bite this off, I kinda have to do it all alone.
Thought option 3: It’s not too much. This seems to be my best thought option. It feels weird but let’s play with it.
I have to write, pick up a uniform, pick up a kid, get to Dr., feed 2 kids, get to ball game, be at a ball game for 2 hours, drive 40 minutes home, get kids ready for bed, feed myself, clean up, get to bed.
Why does this feel so heavy? It’s fast paced but it’s doable.
It feels heavy and overwhelming because it’s not what I want to be doing.
Aha.
When I set about my afternoon tasks I didn’t mentally commit to the experience. Part of me really wanted to spend time with my husband at the lake. I wanted to write from the porch. I wanted to go on a walk.
I was living in that fantasy when I got in the car to do 17 things that weren’t that.
I now know how to get right. I need to schedule these things for tomorrow or the next day. I need to see that I have space for me too.
When do this, my new thought can be – neutral. It can just be that I have a lot of things to do. No biggie. No emotions. Just go.
I’m still in the Dr’s office. But my heart has slowed. I feel less frantic. I’m actually excited to flip to my calendar and put these fun things on my schedule.
Wow.
Yep, sometimes the coach still needs coaching.
I can teach you how to make these shifts.
This is one of the tools we learn in coaching. This works in life and in business.
Ever feel completely overwhelmed at work? Yeah. I thought so.
Schedule a consultation with me to learn more about 1:1 coaching.
